1 Oct 2025
last month I bought an old workvan in a nearby city, and today I had a day off work so I went and bought some rust sealant so I can work on a few surface rust spots on the roof.they didnt have a piece I was looking for to fix one of the back door latches, but One thing at a time. She's nothing pretty (yet) but she's sturdy and will be a good first van so I can get an idea of what I'm doing. I'm gonna try to DIY all the small repairs I can, thouroghly check her over for any issues I might have (but REALLY hope I didn't) missed, I'm planning on building out the inside of her and taking her on the road for a while!
Ive been living in the same state (I'm in the USA) for way way too long (5 years!!)and I miss being a part of the world. I've somehow gone this long in my life without ever having to drive or getting my drivers liscense, but I've been fantasizing about this since I stopped travelling about a decade ago, so I decided to bite the bullet and go for it. Driving is fairly nerve wracking, especially in such a large vehicle, but I find I'm mostly stressed due to other people on the road!
I'm still debating with myself on if I should keep it a stealth van or not. I would love to paint a mural on the side, but it would make it much more conspicuous, so I'm still mulling it over. I will probably end up choosing happiness over safety, since that's sort of what this is all about. If I do it It's gonna be one of the last things, so I've got all the time in the world to ruminate.
Anyway I should probably actually go sand it down and seal the rust in, so that's it for now,
Shepherd
21 Sep 2025
Hey look who's back!! Not actually much to say right now, I'm typing this as I'm SUPPOSED to be getting ready for work, so this is gonna have to be quick lol. I spent my morning getting back into the feel of coding, tweaking my linux setup, and doing some minor updates on the site, and I thought a blog post would be a good way to end this little computer session :0)
I got a new guestbook for this site, I'm in the process of buying a new (well used, but new for me) van, gonna explore a new cave system next month, lots of new stuff, too much to really even scratch the surface on so I guess it will all just have to be for me to know lol. The van is a relevant piece of info though because I'm planning on living out of it and hitting the road for x amount of time, which is something I've only been fantasizing about for the past decade and a half, and is something I'm only estatic about finally being able to put into reality. Now I'm just faced with the banality of manifesting it through liability insurance plans and job applications. I'll do my best to power through, but I hate this kind of stuff, so I'll have to find a way into tricking myself into thinking it's fun. Still don't know what I actually want to use this blog for, but I guess that's a problem for next entry.
Signing out (and clocking in DX),
Shepherd
16 Sep 2025
Bad news is I have not been coding. Good news is I have been enjoying what seems like every other hobby under the sun. About 2 weeks ago now a friend and coworker of mine gave me a BUNCH of pc parts and even helped me build my first ever pc!! I was given everything except the wifi card, so it doesnt help the wifi problem, but it DID reignite my love for tinkering around with random linux bs, so i'm getting back into it :0) I left for the ocean 4 days ago because I volunteered to help with a music festival (which has become somewhat of a biannual tradition at this point, as it also gives me a good excuse to travel and see family) so I had to leave my pc at home, but I took my laptop with me, so here we are.
Having a blog just dedicated to my personal life updates doesn't give me a lot of inspiration to write, so I'm thinking about turning this more into a notebook that I can put little essays about whatever I'm learning about on that day. It would mean I update it a lot more, which is kinda the point of having a blog.
we'll see what happens?
Shepherd
25 April 2025
Good news is I have been coding! Bad news is that a couple months back I tried seting up linux mint on my T2 macbook and fucked up my abiliy to use the internet or bluetooth, so I haven't been getting on neocities to update stuff. I just used my phone to grab some of the code and USB'd it to my mostly-functional computer, so I'm gonna start having fun with this again! If I make some big update maybe I'll USB the code back onto a connected device and upload the changes, if not, then y'all will just have to wait a little while longer haha.
A lot of my links have died since I've last been able to check things out. My guestbook is down, youtube deleted the 2003 tmnt episodes I linked, etc. I'm gonna have to replace those when I get the chance. I think I'll also link my flight rising (which I've also been neglecting for WAY to long) and maybe get on spacehey when I can get my internet back up. I think it will actually be a pretty simple fix (knock on wood), I really just need to take a day to sit down and do it, but keep using up my motivation on irl things. Bluh.
9 September, 2024
So much for "getting back into it" lol. I got hit by a truck in late July and have been in the hospital for god knows how long. Good news is I'm almost back to normal with only doublevison and a couple small scars to show for it all. I don't really have memory of the hit-and-run or the first chunk of the hospital visit, but I was told I had an impressive recovery, going from comatose, to basically vegatative, to consious but pretty out of it, to suddenly "coming back" basically overnight (which is also around the time my memory starts to kick back in). Now I'm outpaient and for the most part feel like I'm functioning overall normally, although I acknowledge I'm the quintessential unreliable narrarator in this scenario.
Bad news is my health insrance was apparently still tied to the last state I was living in, so I've been having to argue with health insurance people just as much as talk to doctors. My dad called my experience "kafka-esque" the other day. He doesn't know that word's become a meme, but I'm still inclined to agree with him. My curren state is known for having pretty bad health insurance policies, so unil further notice I'm hoping for the best and preparing for the worst.
That thing about geting a second lease on life is so true btw. I had what could almost be called a spiritual awakening of sorts while in the hospital. I decided that if I'm gonna get a second chance to live life I should actually live it. My story should actally be told, at least in some measure. "Van life" was already the goal, and I already had some pretty spiritual books on my shelves, but I wasn't actively working towards any steps to get a van together and I hadn't really engaged with any form of magic since I was in elementary school. I've had to put van life on the shelf for the immediate future because clearing my doublevision comes first, but everything else about my life I'm starting to engage with more and more! That means fleshing out the faith I was raised with, yes, but also I've been bringing back all my old/abandoned hobbies! Today I sat and drew for the first time since the pandemic! wow!
Wish me luck, I'll need it :0)
Shepherd
16 July, 2024
Wow ok there’s a big time gap here (first entry 8 January 2024), but hi again i’m back! I’ve been feeling a little stuck in life and it made me fall into a bit of a depressive slump. It wasn’t anything too serious, but enough that I stopped keeping up with my interests for a hot minute there! Good news is I’ve been on lots of road trips out west to reconnect with various friends and family members, I’m out socializing more often, I’ve set life goals and I’m (very slowly) working towards them, and now I’m picking up my hobbies again. All in all I’ve been doing much better!!
I don’t have anything much to say here except that I want to be more active again, and that I’m gonna try to take this website (along with some other creative hobbies like drawing) less seriously. My hobbies are supposed to be things I do for myself because I find them interesting, but I’ve been treating everything like its for a grade, and I get so wound up in not messing up (or looking too cringe) that I kill my passion, so I’m gonna try to just let things flow. I’m also gonna try to put more active interest into my hobbies; sort of flush the decade-long art block away one unimpressive project at a time. Instead of letting myself rot on the couch I’m gonna force myself to knit scarves, crochet granny squares, doodle dumb things, play repetitive bass riffs, write shitty poems, and type website breaking code until I stop being scared of creating. Healing usually hurts like pressing on a bruise and itches like a scab, so wish me luck!!
I'll (hopfully) talk to you soon!
Shepherd
8 January, 2024
Hi everyone,
Soft launching my blog by saying happy (belated) new year to us all and happy birthday to me! Typing this out real quick while I eat breakfast and then I’m headed out for the day, I wasn’t expecting the rain, but theres still plenty of fun things to do. I think I might check out a local arcade that’s been here longer than I have (and yet i STILL haven’t gone to check it out! We’re changing that today!!).
I say this is a soft launch because I still can’t get the CSS on my blog theme quite right, so for now I’m just using my default/main theme, and i’ll update the layout later. I’ve just been getting a little frustrated having to hold in (and then losing) all my cool ideas/inspiration for blog posts, so I’ve decided to let myself write them and accept that not everything can be perfect when I’m first starting out. This feels like my first big project on this website (other than the website itself, which will probably never be finished lol), so some clunkiness as I’m learning is normal and fine and I’m gonna stop beating myself up over it.
Signing off for now,
Shepherd
